Stop global warming - Kill all cows!

According to recent reports that spankin', new Yukon adorning your driveway may not be the main culprit in the oft reported global warming phenomenon. More likely, it's the pig on your plate. That's right, the real perpetrators of greenhouse gas emissions are of the bovine variety. A large percentage of the world's total greenhouse gas emissions are actually caused by farting farm animals and stacks of cow poop. Go ahead, you can still take delivery of that custom Prius you ordered, it couldn't hurt, just don't swing through the drive through for a Big Mac on the way home.

According to the U.S. Government's Energy Information Administration (they have administrations for everything) 2005 report “Emissions of Greenhouse Gases in the United States 2004”, the transportation sector in the U.S. produced 2,000 million metric tons CO2 equivalent (MMTCO2e) of greenhouse gas emissions. According to a new report Food and Agriculture Organization of the United Nations, agriculture is responsible for 18% of worldwide greenhouse gas emissions. However, in the U.S. agricultural emissions of methane and nitrous oxide, the two main greenhouse gas components of agriculture, amounted to only about 232 MMTCO2e in 2004. That's only 11.6% of the transportation total, and 3.2% of total emissions. Do we just have cleaner cows than the rest of the world?

Sadly, no, our cows are just as stinky as everyone else's. More likely is that we have more cars than cows, a situation not found in much of the rest of the world. As the rest of the world struggles to emulate our economic success, and pull it's people from the poverty that's enslaved them since the dawn of time, two things occur. One, they want to ride, rather than walk. Second, they want a nice burger. You guessed it, that makes for Chevy dealerships and McDonald's restaurants springing up around the world like 'shrooms after a spring rain.

When people are prosperous, much to the chagrin of the PITA crowd, they acquire a taste for beef. When they're poor, they eat more chicken, a foodstuff that's less greenhouse gas intensive to breed, raise and keep than cattle. According to the FAO report, per capita meat consumption in developing countries has tripled in the last 30 years, although it's still barely a third of that in developed nations. Developed nations however, are increasing their meat consumption at a vastly slower rate. The increase in the same time period only amounted to 18%.

Increasing prosperity is moving the world to increase greenhouse gas emissions. This is occurring at a greater rate in the developing world. Although the U.S. still leads the world in total greenhouse gas emissions, our output of gases as a percentage of our GDP is actually falling as we switch from a manufacturing to an information economy. As manufacturing capacity is increasingly moved from developed nations, such as the U.S., to third world and Asian countries, green house gas emissions move with them. Concurrently, citizens of developing nations have found the joys of zipping down the road in air conditioned comfort and are increasingly able to afford it.

This must be stopped at once! If the poor people in these other nations get a taste of the prosperity we've enjoyed for years, who knows where it will all lead. They too will be driving to Burger King with their A/C on “MAX” to combat the sweltering heat and humidity. We can't allow that to happen, can we, lest their prosperity and subsequent greenhouse gas emissions spell the end for us all. Unless we want a taste of the sweltering heat and humidity they struggle with on a daily basis, we've got to clam down on world wide economic growth. Do we want citizens of other nations to drive Escalades and live in McMansions? I say “NO!”

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